Divad’s Soundtrack #33: July-August 2001

This is the dreaded “post-breakup” mix. It’s actually one of my favorites, because while I could have taken it in an unapologetically depressed and angry direction (and I did give into those emotions here and there), there’s actually a sense of hope and even a slight hint of excitement at the chance to start over that emerges as the second disc winds down. Even in my darkest hour, I was somehow convinced that there would be better days ahead.

In with the New:
Michelle Branch
Superchic[k]
Matchbox Twenty
Circadian Rhythm
Dixie Chicks
Radiohead

Out with the Old:
Beanbag
Train
Cake
Ceili Rain
PfR

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/2tlJaR9leF0Qh9gD74Bs3d
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/7JtPVenHw2jLXRsaxOgguk

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Divad’s Soundtrack #32: May-June 2001

This is the last mix that was made during my first long-term relationship. A lot of the songs represent the longing I felt at the time to make it work and my ill-advised attempts to patch it all together. Yet, when I go back and listen to these songs, instead of reliving a lot of anguish over how it all slipped through my fingers, I instead recall the growing satisfaction with solitude that I was beginning to learn back then. A lot of my happiest moments in those days were spent by myself. Some were prayerful, some were exploratory, and some were just plain relaxing. Some of these songs were the ones that helped to prepare me for a difficult process of letting go.

In with the New:
The Benjamin Gate
Train
Kevin Max (as a solo artist – appears earlier with dc Talk)
Sandra McCracken

Out with the Old:
Katy Hudson
Kendall Payne
Smalltown Poets

It Was Worth a Try:
Smash Mouth

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/4ocxZb1G7JEDxIdsI2iSBp
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/0rak4xPP8EstvRjPl7TJH2

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Divad’s Soundtrack #31: March-April 2001

If you could graph my emotions during the spring of 2001, it would be a slowly declining spoke with a sudden spike in the middle of March. That spike represents my first trip to Hawaii, a place that would come to have great significance in my life even if I had no way of knowing it at the time. At this point, I desperately wanted a way to “rekindle” the fire that was rapidly dying out in my relationship with Sharon, and once the opportunity to visit a friend of hers in Hawaii came up, I held out a lot of hope that our time there together would revive our happiness.

In with the New:
Katy Hudson
Nicole C. Mullen
Linkin Park
Incubus
Tait
Andrew Peterson

It Was Worth a Try:
Skypark
Lee Ann Womack

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/1XdqFdtugAsiofqCqqBWF7
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/63uQ5tSanAv56DbkqPZkA2

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Divad’s Soundtrack #21: May-July 1999

 

This mix represents the summer of a lifetime, Part II. (1996 being Part I.) Most of this time was spent on Catalina Island, serving in and around the kitchen, and missing loved ones dearly, but figuring I must have been growing from the experience… right? I doubted it at times. After about the halfway point, I was nearly insufferable, counting the days and hardly being able to talk about anything other than wanting to be with my girlfriend again. But let’s not count out the friends I made at camp that summer – fellow staff members who played a variety of roles, some who challenged me to be more patient and forgiving, and some who I clicked with as if they’d been college friends living in the dorms with me for four years. Now I think about some of those folks and miss them dearly, and that’s the thing about graduating from college and wholeheartedly investing different parts of my life in different places – for the rest of my life, there’ll always be someone across a body of water or a long stretch of land who I will miss dearly. But I was challenged a lot that summer – by willingly giving up time with someone I loved during the summer, and by the time I spent with her when I came back in July and had to start adjusting to life as a full-fledged adult looking for work in the “real world”. The bulk of that didn’t hit until August, so this mix mainly covers that nomadic and difficult, but highly memorable summer.

In with the New:
The Juliana Theory

It Was Worth a Try:
Buck
Sarah McLachlan

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/5pzVDsHLgnl0glm2FQTtgk
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/4ajoSFAfDYxQA40BuPLJhR

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Divad’s Soundtrack #20: March-April 1999

Life was good in the Spring of 1999. It felt like I was preparing for adventures that I might not get to have ever again, and as I wrapped up my senior comps, I found myself with a lot of time on my hands, which I tried to make count by spending it with friends that I might not see a lot of after graduating. I came in a wide-eyed, ignorant freshman in the fall of 1995, and that felt like it had only been yesterday – who was I to suddenly be one of the big guys, the ones everyone would be giving a warm send-off, the people expected to go out and create a brighter future? I was barely 21. I was still a kid. But those days felt rich, and God was setting me up for big changes. This set kind of becomes my “commissioning mix” towards the end, because several songs focus on leaving my current life behind and having God lead me out into the unknown with some sense of missional purpose. In some ways, I saw my aspiration to go back to Campus By the Sea for the summer as a sort of “mission”, a way that I could serve and learn new things, because it had been that for me the first time around.

In with the New:
SonicFlood
Lloyd
Polarboy

Out with the Old:
Human

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/1vtt8MvJKqlrHLtk9GTSSf
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/6myt8fodHdQBCFYfuWCb47

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Divad’s Soundtrack #19: January-February 1999

This is how my last semester of college began: I had a wide array of good friends, a girlfriend who was as excited to spend time with me as I was with her, a good plan for how I was going to finish my senior comps (that’s like a senior thesis at other schools) that brought my studies of math and philosophy together due to inspiration from a cognitive science class that I had taken, a job that I could do confidently and fit around my class schedule, and no classes before 1:30 in the afternoon. I was doing a lot of hard work, but for the most part, living the good life. I was trying to avoid thinking about the fact that it would all have to change in a few short months.

In with the New:
Silage
Plaid

Out with the Old:
Seven Day Jesus

It Was Worth a Try:
Wilshire

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/3CpLdQhrmO7TDzN3H6V6vH
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/2e3bvmTasHHoSCJWgXanyA

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Divad’s Soundtrack #18: October-December 1998

I’ll warn you ahead of time that a lot of the songs on this mix, and their reasons for being there, are exceptionally mushy ones. October 1998 was when Sharon and I “officially” started our relationship, and to someone who had never been in a serious relationship before, that rocked my world. Seems strange, reminiscing about those days now when I’m married to someone else. But it’s not about wanting those days back; it’s about realizing how those events contributed to making me the person I am today. My ex is also married now (to the guy who, ironically, had broken up with her in January 1998, which kind of led her to her initial interest in me as I tried to console her as a friend), and I think what she and I experienced together was a building block in terms of helping us both sort out what we wanted in a mate. As Lina once told me, you always remember your first love. I’d rather remember the wisdom we both gleaned from our time together, rather than being bitter and wanting to erase that portion of my life.

In with the New:
Burlap to Cashmere
The Echoing Green
This Train
Michelle Tumes

Out with the Old:
Grammatrain
4Him
Fold Zandura
Mayfair Laundry

Listen on Spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/4V6tIlpMdm2D79HUMvf6NJ
https://open.spotify.com/user/1297881374/playlist/23BNon8AVsT4A2yjJu8QbM

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